[not exactly normal]

we plan our lives in phases. we set goals. to take in the whole picture all at once usually tends to overwhelm us and even scare us sometimes. one step at a time, we tell ourselves. we can handle it if we take it one step at a time. if we take small bites, we can consume the largest tasks; so long as our patience or the patience of someone else doesn't wear thin. our ability to overcome is contingent upon our resolve.

when our plans are reflected in God's plan, or perhaps, when our plans are a mirror image of God's plan, we have a part to play but the outcome is not contingent upon our resolve or zeal. it will be accomplished, with or without us. with us. or without us.

when we feel like failures, when we feel like the whole world has fallen on us, when we lose our focus, God stands waiting for us to approach Him. He is ok with us collapsing in His arms and weeping. He doesn't mind if we tell Him that we can't handle it by ourselves. He smiles, His arms are wide open and He cries with us.

He is not a "good-time only" God. He doesn't leave us when times get tough. He is a true gentleman. He is a complete Lover. He fought for us. He died for us. He overcame the grave for us.

our transparency shows off His strength. our openess glorifies His grace. the less of "us" that we put on in the morning, the more room for people to see God in all of His magnificent glory at work in our lives. This is what John the Baptist meant.

even if we feel terrible. even if we feel like the world is closing in. when we allow for God to come and take over, people are drawn to Him. This doesn't mean that when we feel terrible and people ask us how we are doing that we put on plastic facades and and pretend that we're ok. it does mean that when we're asked, we are transparent and still point to Jesus. "you know, i'm struggling a little bit with... but by the grace of God, i am overcoming it." not exactly normal, is it? watchman nee wrote that "we are so used to the subnormal that when we finally encounter the normal we think it is abnormal."

life is a big picture. to try to take it all in at once can be overwhelming. for those of us who are saved, we have read the last chapter (at least, we know the outcome) and it should allow us to put life into perspective. that no matter what, God is still God and as long as we follow Him and His commands, we will come out victorious as heirs with Christ Jesus.

our pain allows us to identify. our struggles offer hope to the hopeless. and our humanity allows us to reach others. if we act perfect and as if nothing can touch us then we elevate ourselves above everyone else and then we have nothing to offer anyone else except the false idea that God makes everything great for a believer.